The Beauty-Not-Beauty Problem

These characters are almost always women, usually young women in YA novels: women who are very beautiful, but don’t think they are beautiful. They look into the mirror, describing themselves in terms which make it clear they are definitely above average in looks, but at the same time consider themselves to be lacking. Everyone else also seems to consider them lacking - except for their love interest, of course.

The problem with this trope is twofold: on one hand, it’s highly unrealistic that an attractive young woman would never hear she is attractive. Even if she only looks at those glossy magazines or adverts, other people around her will have noticed how good she looks. On the other hand, it also gives birth to a different character: the beautiful villainess. To counteract the beautiful-but-unaware heroine, the villainess or one villainess is often a woman who knows she is beautiful, does everything in her powers to enhance that beauty, and uses it for her own plans. So we have the pure, unaware heroine and the evil seductress, two roles which have been played to death by women already (it comes down to the virgin/whore dichotomy we already know from the bible).

Then there’s, of course, this highly unrealistic way the heroine (or hero) will describe themselves. If a regular human looks into the mirror, they’re more likely to comment on how their hair is completely out of control, about blackheads on their nose, pimples on their chin, or something similar. They will hardly comment on the glossiness of their hair, the perfect shape of their arse, or those horribly long, well-shaped legs they have. If you’re really thinking you’re ugly, you look for everything which cements that idea, not for all those good-looking parts of your body.

But the big problem with the beautiful-but-unaware heroine is that this trope also cements that a woman has to be ‘naturally beautiful’ (without the use of makeup or other things) and that a good woman is not aware of her own beauty until the right man comes along and tells her (which suggests female beauty only exists for a man to appreciate). This is far from the reality of the audience, since only few people are naturally beautiful (makeup exist for a reason and has done so for a long time) and a woman shouldn’t depend on a man for appreciation (or on something as fleeting as her looks).

If you want a heroine who is really troubled about her looks, give her reason. Give her an average look in a surrounding where everyone else is beautiful (perhaps she lives with two models as flatmates?). Or give the heroine the knowledge that she is beautiful and have her act on it. Or make her not care about her looks at all - not because she is so beautiful she doesn’t need to care, but because she has other things on her mind than her looks (shocking idea, I know - a woman who doesn’t care what she looks like, because she’s doing other stuff). More about this later.

There are other things about the way women are often described in novels, especially YA, but other genres, too.

Like the idea that women are natural at wearing heels. They are not, it’s a skill you have to learn and it can be very painful to do so. And women who are in a physically challenging job or a job where they might have to run (especially looking at all thrillers and crime series with female cops here), will not be wearing heels to work. They’ll be wearing sneakers or low-heeled oxfords or something similar.

Or that all women have long nails. Women who work in medical jobs (wearing gloves) or in jobs where they use their hands a lot (gardeners, for instance) will have short nails, because everything else would be impractical. Women in a lesbian relationship will also wear their nails short, but for other, more personal reasons. Make of that information what you want.

Or that bras are optional. They’re not, unless you have an A-cup (which is the smallest size). There’s a reason bras were invented and it wasn’t so men had something to look at (as for a long time, women wouldn’t simply show their undergarments, unless they were in a very specific line of work). Breasts are heavy and need support. That is what a bra is for. If a woman does sports, she will wear a specific bra for it. And the bra shapes the breast, which means the same top can look completely different, depending on whether a woman wears a bra and which bra she wears.

There’s more, but I’m not going to rehash it all. Consult this article for additional details about women which men often get wrong in writing.

Yet, what comes up again and again is that whole beautiful-but-unaware thing. The idea that a good woman can’t have a clue about her good looks. She has to be beautiful (because fairy tales teach us that beauty means goodness from childhood), but she’s not allowed to be aware of it or use it to her advantage (because then she might be vain, which is a sin). She has to be innocent and pure and unaware of the powers of womanhood. And that idea just has to go.

As mentioned, it’s unrealistic. A woman with access to a mirror and to friends and acquaintances (not to mention relatives) should know whether or not she fits with the current beauty standards. She should know that those glossy strands of hair and those long legs don’t make her ugly, but conventionally attractive. If your heroine were blind, of course, she could be unaware (but then she wouldn’t care about her looks, because beauty would be a strange concept to her). But if she can see and if she has access to peers, she should be aware of how beautiful or ugly she really is - within reason, women can still be hung up on the slightest flaw. Flaws, however, are not ‘long legs’ or ‘glossy hair’ or ‘big bust.’ Flaws are things like ‘flabby thighs’ or ‘blackheads’ or ‘untameable hair.’ Those are things a heroine would focus on, if she were unhappy with her own looks.

Why not have a character who is average in looks, knows it, but doesn’t care too much about it? She wouldn’t mind following the hero on his quest (which means a lot of travel and little time for beauty care), because it helps her to reach her own goals. She won’t mind cutting her hair, so she looks more like a guy, because the plot demands it. She will not start bitching, because a second female character joins the group and this one is definitely above average in looks. Instead, they will befriend each other and save the guys’ asses later on.

Or have a character who is beautiful and knows it. A woman who knows she looks very good and doesn’t need someone to assure her of that. She uses makeup and spends more time choosing her clothes, because she knows how much it can affect other people. She doesn’t look down on other women who are less attractive or feels the need to fight those who look as good as her. Her looks are for her own pleasure - if someone else likes them, it’s a bonus, not her reason to live. If a guy doesn’t find more to compliment her on than her hair and her body, he’s out. She will use her knowledge to swing opinion in the council and lead the kingdom into a better future.

Or have a character who doesn’t even think about her looks much. She’s a warrior in training and more likely to consider her body on terms of strengths and weaknesses. She surely needs to build up her arm muscles more, so she can wield her sword better. And she needs to work on her legs for agility, too. She’s cut her hair ages ago and keeps it short, because who wants to braid the hair every morning to keep it out of her eyes, when a short cut makes it so much easier to deal with? She simply ignores other people’s comments about her looks, because they don’t matter. If you want to flatter her, tell her how good her sword technique or her legwork are. In the big battle, she will save the hero and cut the right hand of the big bad down without a second’s hesitation.

Depending on the world a story is set in, each of those heroines would make sense. They’d be less likely to become damsels in distress, too, which is good.

There might be the occasional woman who doesn’t know her looks are above average. And there are a lot of women who do look good, but still are more likely to see their flaws than their strengths. Yet, having every other heroine of a YA novel think she’s not beautiful, while at the same time describing herself in terms of definite ‘above average’ looks, is an old cliché which needs to die.