The first draft of a story, long or short, is always horrid. It’s something most writers will never show anyone else, will only keep so they can revise it and make something better out of it. Yet, without the first draft, there is no story, and that is what makes it important to get it all out, to get this first draft on paper (or into a file).
“You have a lot of bad writing in you and you need to get it all out” is a motto I have read somewhere once, a long time back - and one I now use to remind myself why the first draft is so necessary. The first draft is all that bad writing which I need to get out first. I write down a basic timeline by now, have for a couple of books, but that is only giving me the direction in which I’m steering the characters. This is to know what is going to happen when (and there can still be surprises while I write).
The first draft, love it or hate it or both, is a way of getting that idea from the concept in your mind (or a file) into the right shape - into a story. The first draft is where you put your ideas to paper, pin them down, and make sure they stay where they’re supposed to. That doesn’t have to be beautiful, just as the first, rough sketch doesn’t have to be beautiful, as long as it gives you the basic measures, shapes, and proportions. The finished product, be it a story or a painting, can read or look very differently, but it won’t exist without that first sketch - because that is what a first draft is, too: a sketch of what you want to create.
Especially when you just start your writing, when you haven’t seen a couple of first drafts and then compared them in your mind to your finished stories, the first draft can make you feel like a failure. Your only comparison usually is the polished and finished work of your favourite authors - books which have been through a tight and often long editing and revising process which turned that horrid first draft into something infinitely better.
The first draft is never what is published, no matter how good the author is. There’s always a long process which follows that first draft, but it needs the first draft to work. Once you have realized that, you will be much more relaxed when it comes to judging your own first drafts and that is a good thing. You need to learn to go into your first draft with less pressure.
That doesn’t mean, of course, that you shouldn’t try to make your first draft work - the fewer mistakes there are in it, the fewer of the content you need to change later. Yet, there’s no need to do it all perfectly. This sentence looks a bit odd? Ignore it, that’s a case for revision and editing. You’re not sure about that line of dialogue? Leave it in, you can work on it later. You’re not completely happy with this character’s name? Keep it for now, the ‘search and replace’ function can take care of it later. Try to keep the story working, try to keep the plots in line. This first draft mostly is there to make the story work, the details can be fleshed out in latter revisions. The first draft is there to get your idea on paper (well, into a file these days). The second, third, fourth, and fifth draft are for all those details, for the grammar, the spelling, the wording. That’s not what you should worry about in the beginning.
Writing is a long process with a lot of different steps, from the first ideas and the research to the finished book you can publish - for free or for money. Writing the story down is only one step on the way, usually neither the first nor the last one. It’s an important step, the moment you pin your ideas down and see how all those plots you’ve worked out, all those characters you’ve created, all those things you’ve researched or invented for the story play together. The first draft is the moment you see it all together, the starting point from which you can extrapolate, add and subtract things, make the plots run more smoothly.
You will change things afterwards, tighten scenes or expand them, add sub-plots or take out parts that are just slowing the story down. You may want to give one character more space to shine or combine two smaller characters into one to make things less complicated for the audience. You will also hunt down grammar and spelling errors, of course, but that is for much later revisions and edits, for the time when you’re happy with the plots and the story. That doesn’t mean you should ignore such an error when you see it, but you shouldn’t focus too much on that level, that can come later.
Do not worry yourself too much about that first draft. It will be rough, it will be unpolished, it will be weak in some areas and strong in others. There will be mistakes in the story logic. There will be passages which need serious rewriting. There will be characters who will change severely until they’re ready for publication.
Remember that quote about bad writing above. Where, if not in the first draft which will be severely edited and revised later, should you let all of that out so you can get to the good and the great writing? Nowhere. Let yourself run wild with the first draft, pin the story down as it is in your head, in your notes. Don’t censor yourself - you can tone down violent or erotic content later if it seems unfitting with the general tone. Write down what you have in your mind, don’t hold back. Experiment with the tone and with the point of view, try to find out what will work best for the story you have in mind. Don’t worry too much about inconsistencies, those are something to take care of later. You will polish the story in every aspect, from content over grammar and spelling to wording and beyond - eventually.
Your first draft is horrible, but you should still love it. It’s an important step into the right direction, an important step towards the finished story you want to see. It will need a lot of tender care, though. You should embrace it and love it and give it the care which will turn this ugly duckling into a swan eventually. I’m not saying that will be an easy or quick thing, but it will happen, trust me.
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